Over the years, I have come across a lot of criticisms of people suffering from OCD - sometimes these critics are the patients themselves, but most often it is from friends and family, who just don’t seem to understand OCD; unfortunately, it is even sometimes therapists themselves who are critical due to their own lack of knowledge with regards to OCD. Here I will review some of the more popular criticisms. ***Keep in mind that any individual can be an exception to the rule, but for the vast majority of people I’ve ever worked with, the statements below hold true***
You are not “crazy”. You do not have schizophrenia. You do not have a formal thought disorder. Yes the obsessive thoughts you get can be a little (or a lot) “out there” and yes, many compulsions can make someone look very odd, but at the end of the day, you suffer from a condition which is biologically based and originates in the brain. Just as someone else born with a different biological condition (i.e., Type 1 diabetes), you are afflicted much the same. You are not “crazy”, or “insane”, or any other negative label you might have been given. You have OCD, period.
You are not stupid. I hear this one a lot. Just about everyone I’ve ever met with OCD has been a very logical-minded individual. Patients tend to be very good problem-solvers in other areas of their lives, where logic is helpful, and they pride themselves on their logical mind and ability to fix things using this mindset - overall this provides a sense of self-efficacy and makes one feel capable and intelligent.
Understandably then, when faced with OCD, these same individuals assume OCD is just another problem they will solve logically…in short, this assumption is wrong. At best, logic simply is ineffective against OCD; at worst, it “feeds” it, and symptoms intensify. Using logic against OCD is a losing battle - but you would never know that - you are simply following human instinct. That doesn’t make you stupid or dumb. You just need to learn what you should do instead.
You are not self-centered. You did not choose to have OCD. You do not choose to have the obsessive thoughts you endure day in and day out. And the compulsive behaviors you engage in - you often do not want to do, but more likely you feel you have to do, just in order to survive. Someone on the outside who does not have OCD will likely see you as someone who is always in their head, selfishly worried about something about themselves. They will erroneously think that you are willfully choosing to focus on these things, and that you could easily not do your compulsions if you cared to, or if you “just tried harder”. Therefore you appear to be someone who only cares about themselves. This couldn’t be further from the truth. If your obsessions are focused on you, it’s not because you want them to be, or not because you enjoy focusing on yourself…and often, obsessions are focused on trying to help/save others you care about (worrying about the safety of loved ones is actually the opposite of being self-centered).
You are not lazy. Often, people suffering with OCD are stuck between obsessions and engaging in compulsions. This is a time-consuming loop and often disrupts normal daily functioning to the point that everyday productivity is impacted (ie, lack of homework completion, lower output at work, inability to attend school, unemployment, etc.). The casual observer might notice this and assume you are lazy. If they only knew how much hard work - blood, sweat, and tears (literally and figuratively) - you put into trying to manage your OCD, they wouldn’t call you lazy. People with OCD are some of the hardest working people I know. They are working so so hard! They just aren’t spending that time and energy doing what will actually help them get better. Fortunately, we can redirect that energy towards therapeutic responding, which can be a total game changer.
You MAY not have ADHD. Very often, parents of children with OCD are contacted by a caring teacher, who notices that the child is unable to pay attention in class. The child seems to be caught in a daydream much of the time while in class, thinking about other things, and ultimately unable to consistently focus. As a result, they assume your child likely has ADHD. While this might in fact be true, often times children with OCD look just like a child with ADHD. This is because as a result of OCD, a child is getting unwanted thoughts throughout the day (even in school) - these thoughts are highly-anxiety provoking - the child might then be worried about the thought and trying to figure out a way to prevent a bad thing from happening. If they are thinking about all of this while in the classroom, it would be very difficult if not impossible for them to effectively maintain their concentration. So what looks like ADHD, may actually be a case of inattention due to anxiety created by the OCD.